An Unfair Advantage

Here’s what they told us: ten laps around the goal posts was exactly one mile; and twelve laps was equivalent to two kilometres (since our gym teacher also taught math and was supposed to be teaching us the metric system that year); and that all of this effort was in preparation for our “timed run” where we’d soon discover the maximum distance we could cover in ten minutes using nothing but our skinny, hairless legs. Except that later Tony confessed he’d spent his final lap farting, and wondered if the resulting propulsion might not have given him an unfair advantage.