Winnipeg and Losers

Last week, Germany’s runaway, Yvonne, was captured after a dramatic three-month cowhunt and placed in sanctuary with her son, Friesi. Worse, Happy Feet – a penguin who’d washed up on New Zealand’s shore – was set paddling toward Antarctica, tweeting to followers worldwide. To Stephen frickin’ Fry, of The Hobbit's cast. Meanwhile, the only feel-good news Canada can choke out of all its wilderness has a woman pop a bear in the nose to save her dachshund, Fudge. Oh, crap, that was Alaska; the entire Hobbit cast must be thinking we’re losers. It doesn’t matter. It can’t. Because we’ll always have Winnipeg.

Image: AP.