Happy MotherF’ing New Year 😊😊😊

The fuel burning furnace shot out a spark. I see it land on a newspaper pile and catch.
I tell my housemate this.
They say, “You’re an extemist.”
I say, “You’re anti-science.”
We smell the smoke now.
But the fridge door still leans against the wall.
I’d wanted it mounted left.
They’d wanted it mounted right.
Fire alarms go off now.
I take one down, remove the battery.
They grab a broom, smash the other.
I hold a knife to their throat. “You’re a fascist fuck.”
They hold a pot of boiling oil over my head. “You’re a commie cuck.”

Inspired by Bravo, F! Illustration by Fred Ni.