Come Quickly

     At home, if you want them to come quickly, tell them you smell gas.
     At the hospital, tell them you have chest pains to the tips of your fingers, and they’ll wheel you right on past the longest queue.
     Head injuries, too.
     Just tell them you can’t even remember being thrown from your bike . . . out like a light, if just for a moment. When they ask you the date, get it wrong. But be careful, because the moment they figure you’re going to be fine, there’ll be no one there to help you pick the gravel out of your elbows.