Thursday, January 26, 2012

Urine Test

I can usually determine how drunk I am with a simple trip to the toilet. The first indicator is based on how long I need to stand there and is pretty much a direct function of how much I’ve consumed. The second and more subtle measurement is how long I choose to stand there waiting for all that liquid to pass before my addled patience runs dry and I flush. Sober, I’ll wait till I’m done; drunk, I won’t, and so flush when I’m bored, quickly realize my mistake, and race to the finish, pissing in vain against the vortex.

Photo by Sam Bassett (Getty Images)


  1. Um....okay then! lol

    abcw team

  2. as they say in Boston, that's a pissah
    ROG, ABC Wednesday team

  3. I thought it was going to be a story about how you had to take a drug test, and you drank one of those detox drinks that turns your pee yellow, and outs you anyway...


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